Public Speaking Information


Five Tired, Worn Out Speaking Cliches


The subject of public speaking is riddled with tired, worn out cliches we ought to throw out. Here are a few to let go of:

1. "Public speaking is the #1 fear."

You can count on hearing this one any time you take a presentation skills class. The problem is, there's nothing to substantiate it. The quoted source for this "fact" is usually The Book of Lists, which, even in current editions, shows a tiny blurb in the Sunday Times of London from October 7, 1973, as its source. In this article, no mention is made of who did this research, how it was conducted, who the subjects were, whether the subjects were a representative sample of the U.S. population-nothing! Not to mention the fact that this "research" is 30 years old. Haven't people changed in 30 years? And don't we face new fears that weren't even in our consciousness in 1973? Of course. If this research were to be conducted with rigor today, we would likely have a different outcome. This tidy, shocking factoid is easily trotted out when we want to make a point, but it's just not valid. Time to let this one go.

2. "Picture the audience members naked."

OK. So you're nervous about your presentation. Perhaps you're feeling vulnerable and exposed. The solution? Imagine your audience in a humiliating position and, presto, everybody's equally degraded! Does this set up powerful communication? I think not. Rather than mentally stripping (pardon the pun) audience members of dignity so you can feel better, concentrate instead on lifting your own self-image. Besides, there are some people you just don't want to see naked.

3. "If you're too nervous to look them in the eye, look just above their heads at the back wall."

Please. You can tell when someone is looking past you, right? At a party, it's unmistakable when people shift their eyes past your shoulder to see if someone "more important" has entered the room. Besides, the back wall doesn't get a puzzled look when it doesn't understand, nor does it raise its hand when it has something to say. But your listeners do. You have to see them in order to address those needs. You can spend your whole life avoiding eyeballs. Although it might ease your nerves, it defeats the purpose of your talk: to connect. Better to spend time getting over the fear of eyeballs watching you than making audience members wonder, "What on earth is she looking at back there?"

4. "Make eye contact for 3 to 5 seconds per person."

Of course, it's important to look at your listeners. How else can you know if they're following or if they have questions? But giving each person 3 to 5 seconds of eye contact can make you seem mechanical. When I see someone following this rigid rule I can almost hear that person mentally saying "one Mississippi, two Mississippi, three Mississippi." Lee Glickstein, founder of SPEAKING CIRCLES(R) and author of the book Be Heard Now, calls this kind of eye contact "eye service" because when you're following a rule, you're not really connecting; you're just checking a box. ("Woman in the red jacket: check. Guy in the blue tie: check.") Meaningful connections can't be reduced to a technique. Be flexible enough to really see those listeners and let go of the rules.

5. "Find one or two friendly faces in the audience and just speak to them."

It's nice to have support, but when you give the speech to just one or two people, you risk alienating the very supporters you're counting on. If you've ever been on the receiving end of this, you know what I mean. These friendly faces desperately wish you would look at someone else. Besides, if you're facing non-supporters, wouldn't you rather know what they're up to so you can handle their discontent? Often, you can win over those grouchy faces by simply answering a question or addressing a basic concern. If you block the grouches out entirely so you feel more comfortable, they'll be more unhappy because you ignored them. Find encouragement in the supportive faces, yes, but speak to the whole group.

*The SPEAKING CIRCLE(R) method is a revolutionary new approach for developing confidence and charisma in front of groups. For more information, visit http://www.speakingcircles.com.

About The Author

Melissa Lewis turns traditional thinking about public speaking upside down to give people more comfort, confidence, and charisma in front of groups. For more information, call (913) 341-1241 or visit www.upsidedownspeaking.com.

melissa@upsidedownspeaking.com


MORE RESOURCES:

Toastmasters: Here to help you quash your fear of public speaking
Moody County Enterprise, SD - Nov 18, 2008
BY RYAN WOODARD Jerry Doyle has started a local chapter of the public speaking club Toastmasters International, which has members all over the world. ...


Public Speaking Is Not Worse Than Death
dBusinessNews Triangle (press release), NC - Nov 19, 2008
DURHAM, NC November 20, 2008 — Many people fear public speaking, yet it can be an extremely effective method for marketing your business’s services. ...


CBC.ca

Washington Post Staff Writers
Washington Post, United States - 25 minutes ago
Those familiar with the talks said they covered a range of concerns, including the former president's profitable public speaking, his global investment work ...
Video: Hillary Will Get SOS Nom Soon CBS
Hillary Clinton weighing secretary of state post The Associated Press
Bill reveals files to move Hillary closer to top job This is London
guardian.co.uk - Deseret News
all 5,236 news articles


Cheyne is Toastmaster champ
Burlington Union, MA - 16 hours ago
Have you ever wanted to develop your public speaking skills? Mary Cheyne, a Somerville resident and member of The Last Word Toastmasters Club in Burlington, ...


Reviving a Novel-Worthy Tale of War and Religion
New York Times, United States - 1 hour ago
At home and away, the young boy was also trained in horseback riding, public speaking and fighting skills. All would prove crucial. ...


Community calendar
San Jose Mercury News,  USA - 11 hours ago
Hosted meetings to help people improve their public speaking, critical thinking and leadership skills. East Hills Community Church, 12000 Campus Drive. ...


The Boss Inspired by Mom
New York Times, United States - 21 minutes ago
When I was 16, my mother said the biggest thing that had helped her in her life was when her mother and father asked her to take a public speaking class. ...


Program to focus on public speaking
The Reporter, WI - Nov 14, 2008
RIPON — Jody Roy, professor and chair of the communication department at Ripon College, will present a program on public speaking and perfecting ...


Public speaking course essential for repertoire
Kaleidoscope Online, AL - Nov 10, 2008
Cecil Betros, professor of communication studies at UAB, believes it is important for students to take part in a public speaking course. ...


CNET News

Google attempts to save marriages around the world
CNET News, CA - 18 hours ago
Naturally the company has offered the usual public speaking about concentrating on other businesses and accepting that not every bet will work out. ...

Public-Speaking - Google News

home | site map
© 2007